I can’t cope

[Captain24]

So I called a SCBS they have talked me down a little. I managed to go and get stuff for work tomorrow. My chest pain has returned. I think it’s about dinner tonight. It’s only my parents but I don’t really spend time with them anymore. 

[tyme]

Hey @Captain24 ,

What time's dinner? I'm glad you were able to reach out and contact SCBS. 

Did you get up to much today?

[Captain24]

Hey @tyme 

I should have contacted them last night. 

I haven’t done much other than watch tv and sleep. Self inflicted though. I did go to the supermarket for some stuff for work. 

Dinner is at 6 then I’ll have to go to theirs for a little while. I really do appreciate them doing it. They do care in their own way and they like to make a big fuss over it. I feel like a bitch not wanting to go but that’s just because I’m so unwell. 

I did get travel calm while I was up the street so I’ve taken them to help with the feeling sick part. 

[tyme]

Hey @Captain24 ,

Fair enough. I know they care, and you know they care... just in their own way it seems.

From what I remember, I think I did a lot of 'fake it till you make it' when I was in a bad place.

By going to dinner, I hope you get a bit of a break from your thoughts even if it doesn't feel like it.

tyme

[Captain24]

Hey @tyme 

It’ll be good especially since I don’t have to pay for a change. 😜. Plus we will finish of with Woolies mud cake.. 

It will be a break because as you said I have to fake it til I make it. There will be conversation and connection which I desperately need. 

I won’t be on the chat sorry. 

How is Ruby doing? 

[tyme]

My niece taught Ruby to sit today @Captain24 It was cute.

Ruby's okay... the kids are loud and crying...

I have to agree a break away with your parents is a good change, and it will serves its purpose - for a time anyway.

What time do you think you will be back?

We will miss you on the chat tonight.

[Captain24]

That’s cute @tyme 

That would be too much noise for me. But I’m not a big kid fan. 

I think I’ll be done by 8-8:30. I have work tomorrow morning. I did get a certificate from the hospital on Sunday that covers me for tomorrow but I’d better go. 

What’s been happening in your world

[tyme]

Argh... @Captain24 . My world? It is what it is. A bit hectic. I still haven't made it to house sit. I'm sitting, working at my sister's place. They are going out soon so I'll be home alone with the dog. They told me to keep the dog occupied... no thanks lol.

My baby niece is cute though. Mothers Ruby a lot. She picks up all the potentially dangerous things from the floor in case Ruby eats them. She also told Ruby, "No watching!" (Ruby is not allowed to watch the ipad) lol...

[Captain24]

I’m home @tyme. 

It was really good. Dinner was nice. Mum and dad didn’t argue, mum didn’t put dad down, we all just got along well. When we went back to their place for cake it was the same. So it was good. They gave me a really nice jumper 

I do feel sick after eating though. But I do feel sort of ok. It’s a nice feeling, I’m not fighting with myself.

Home alone sounds good. I hope Ruby is behaving herself for you. That’s so cute that the little one is so caring. 

Hope the chat went well

[tyme]

Hey my dear @Captain24 ,

I'm soooo pleased to hear the dinner went better than expected. I honestly can see your parents care a lot. They are probably so stressed themselves and they don't know how to show they care because they also know that you care no matter what.

It's like that 'untold love' that keeps people together.

It sounds like it was a good break for you.

Yes, Ruby was annoying. Whined the whole time during the chat. 

Do you have anything planned for tomorrow?