Contamination thoughts

[creative_writer]

@tyme I could, I just don’t know if I’ll get much help out of it. It’s very hit and miss.

I don’t know if this is self inflicted

[rav3n]

hey @creative_writer how've you been 😊

[creative_writer]

Hey @rav3n overall better. Contamination thoughts are still here, probably to many triggers today

[creative_writer]

I’ve been getting a sinking feeling today. How I dealt with it? online shopping. Now I must utilise another strategy or it’ll be a big hit to my savings account. My brain craves dopamine to avoid the emotional anguish

[Jynx]

Oh don't even get me started on shopping spress @creative_writer smh 😅

Did you at least get some good stuff? My most recent purchases were some sick antique coins ahaha

[creative_writer]

@Jynx  maybe I am more sensation seeking than I thought I was. Or maybe it’s a warning sign, I don’t really know at this point. I do things to escape inner dread.

I was cranky I lost my favourite lavender sanitiser too, and the sanitiser I took to uni smelt different and weird. I can still smell it on my hands, I may have used too much by accident. On top of that todays class on mental health was heavy as it covered trauma.

Going back to what I got. I got coated jeans, a bamboo t shirt and some almond oil for my mum. My mum swears by almond oil for her hands

[creative_writer]

I don't know if my assignment is triggering me, can't seem to get much done 😞

I'm at uni and won't finish till 4:14pm, though my upcoming classes in the afternoon should be low on triggering content. I just wanted to get some assignment work done because I don't want to procrastinate and leave everything to the last moment as I did during the last semester. I have time blindness, so tend to overestimate and underestimate how long tasks take.

On the plus, I found my fav lavender sanitiser. Might be getting too obsessed with sanitisers, but it helps with contamination thoughts

[Ru-bee]

Hi @creative_writer 

That's really tough working on an assignment that has triggering content. I wonder if you'd consider reaching out to your school supports while you're doing the assignment which may allow you to get an extension, as I hear these triggers are slowing progress on it which is very understandable. That way you can give yourself breaks as needed

Hope the afternoon classes have been a bit easier on you

[creative_writer]

@Ru-bee it’s probably a bit early to ask for an extension, the assignment isn’t due for a while. I thought it would be good to get a head start. It’ll probably be worse for my MH if I did it all over a short period of time. Maybe I do need a bit of a break, especially after a heavy class yesterday.

I think this week’s in class case study was probably the biggest trigger. Even more so than the assignment’s case study. I’m already feeling vulnerable from yesterday, so feel things affecting me more.

The afternoon classes went okay

[Jynx]

@creative_writer I mean... could be both right? Hmm... wonder if it depends on if you're seeking familiar vs. novel sensations maybe? I don't actually know enough to make a comment but now I totally wanna research this! Let's see what google says about - 'Is sensation-seeking also an emotional regulator'

Okay was gonna share some of what I found but there's actually a LOT so... probably an after work activity for me 😅

Glad you found your sanitiser! Lavender is such a lush smell, hey. I'm also really partial to jasmine, I'm so excited that it will be jasmine blooming season very soon! Or already is! Must find me a jasmine plant haha.

How'd you go getting some work done? Don't sweat it if you didn't, some days are just a write off hey.