Just checking in.

[Zoe7]

I don't have any words that would take away any of this pain @CheerBear but know I am thinking of you and here for you my sweet CB 

[frog]

@Teej I love that image  and those words

[Snowie]

Thinking of you @CheerBear

[Teej]

Oh @CheerBear im so sorry 😢😢😢😢

with you every step of the way. 💜

[Faith-and-Hope]

@CheerBear  ..... 💜💜💜😞

[outlander]

@CheerBear ❤❤

[Teej]

@CheerBear

im sending this post in parts because it’s not playing nicely.

I hope this quote is ok for you to read just now

Thinking of you

[Teej]

@CheerBear

Thank you for reaching out your hand of support.

knowing how cruel and hurtful and unfair life is for you just now

[Teej]

@CheerBear

im sending you some hope that in time things won’t hurt so much again

I bought this Calothamnus quadrifidus, (one-sided bottlebrush) for $1, 5 years ago. I’m a bit of a native plant lover too. It has been beaten up, had balls knocking branches off, dried out in the heat of summer and this year it has flowered for the first time. This is my hope for you, that you’ll bloom again 💜 

[CheerBear]

Thank you to those who were there with support yesterday. I wrote a big long venty spill and then felt the need to change it. I'm full of jumbled feelings and sometimes feeling pretty hopeless and helpless. I'm confused and tired. I'm hating this thing that is going on and playing out. I hate waiting to find out news or plans. I want a crystal ball. 

There is some hope for some time and maybe that's what I can try and hold on to. All morning I'd lost it but in re-reading my long venty spill, that's what stood out. Getting that time if they want to try to, will be hard and there are some hard times ahead, but it's a chance maybe.

I read the poem you shared @Teej (and love your beautiful plant) which couldn't be more fitting right now. There is so much uncertainty and so much despair. Every day has been full of up and down. I have so many mixed up feelings and memories, as well as the horrible realisation that, even though I am angry and have been hurt by crappy behaviour over lots of years, I'm seriously going to miss this person when it happens (whenever that may be) and I'm seriously thankful for all they've been to me and my littles. It helps to see it as it is and call what it feels like which is grief. They're not gone yet so that doesn't maybe make so much sense, but they will be one day and that one day will be sooner than they'd/we'd like.

I'm very mixed up, very teary and very tired today. Sorry for the jumbled posting.