Lived Experience Forum

[cozy_726]

Content/trigger warning

Hi there, i'm cozy 726.

This is my first time discovering sane and I wish I'd known it existed sooner.

My main mental health issue has been anxiety, just the stress of uni and the stress factor of parents being like you must finish it now etc you know?

I hope i'll be able to share my ups and downs here as its hard not having anyone to speak or share my experiences with, especially because well, these are quiet sensitive topics.

On top of that, I hope to get more tips and coping strategies to help.

Thanks,
Cozy

[NatureLover]

Welcome, @cozy_726 . Anxiety can be utterly debilitating, so you have my empathy. 

You can type anything into the Search bar above to find threads on that topic. Also, a handy forum tip to tag someone is to type @ and then click on their name in the drop-down box - that way they'll get a notification that you've replied to them.

I hope you find the forums supportive 🙂

[Birdofparadise8]

Hi @cozy_726 

I'm sorry to hear how things are going for you. 

I'm also at uni. 

What are you studying? 

[SkySeeker22]

Hi @cozy_726 

Welcome to the forums.  I know what you mean about wishing you'd discovered SANE earlier, I'm in the same boat! I hope you find the support and interaction that you are looking for here.  We are here for support when you need and also to celebrate the wins... I'm a big supporter of celebrating even the tiniest of wins when they happen so feel free to tag me (you can do this using the @ function) in your future posts 🙂

I'm sorry to hear that you are having  a hard time with anxiety and stress...they can have such a big impact on our lives.  Uni can be very stressful on its own, but it sounds like your parents are adding to the stress and pressure with their comments.

A coping/grounding strategy that helps me is a colour related grounding technique.  I pick a random colour in my head and then look around my surroundings and find 5 things that are shades of that colour.  The first few items are generally easy, but sometimes you have to really look around your environment to find all of the 5.  I find that this really helps me center myself.

What are you studying at uni?

You mentioned that you don't have anyone to share your experiences with (and the SANE Forums are the perfect place to be able to do that), but I'm wondering if you've considered support services that are available at your University?  These can include student support where you can talk with others about some strategies that may help with what your are experiencing specifically relating to uni/studying, and even counseling services are available if that would be something you are open to. 

Warm regards

SkySeeker22

[Minkie-Rose]

Hi @cozy_726 

Being close to finishing my second Masters Degree (this time in counselling), I understand the cumulative stressors of study, which for you includes parental pressure.

Based on my experience the following actions can alleviate anxiety:

1. Stay abreast of your readings, don't procrastinate, and contact your lecturers with any queries.

2. Eat well, and take regular breaks. 

3. Try to squeeze in 3-4 exercise sessions a week. A simple 40 minute walk is suffice.

4. Avoid reaching for the stars with every assignment. Your grades are not the "be all and end all".

5. Immerse yourself in nature, music, or simply being.

6. Sleep is absolutely crucial. If this is problematic, make an appointment with your GP. 

7. Keep a sense of perspective - study is only one aspect of your life.

8. Don't quit, rather, just have a rest/break.

Warmly

[cozy_726]

@Birdofparadise8I'm studying bachlor of computer science, majoring in ai.

[cozy_726]

@SkySeeker22Thanks for the coping strategy skyseeker, thats a new one to me and I'll try that.

I currently study a bachelor in computer science with a major in ai.

In terms of uni support, I tried getting counselling, but it didn't go far after the initial appointment. I forgot why exactly, but I think it was more of like lets just see what happens and when you finish and get the results after this term you can see if you still need someone. As originally I was struggling with a core subject and it made me extremely anxious as I needed to pass it, because I passed it I did not think I needed the counselling thing so I never reached back out.

I havent checked if my uni has student group talks with other students. I'll look into it.

The whole parents thing has been at me since childhood, just the expectations of doing well and getting 100 in everything. Its something I want to stop and just have a way of handling 😞

Although my dad has changed a bit, I still feel the pressure like he was still saying it.

[cozy_726]

@Minkie-RoseI tried to stay ahead, unfortunately I've been in a position where I've had to work a lot as well and by the time I get home I'm flat out tired.

I'll try to the the things you listed, exercise is one I struggle with a lot unfortunately, its just hard to want to do and to force myself to do it. Makes me feel like I'm wasting time, but unfortunately I waste time by watching yt videos as I procrestinate.

My sleep schedule has been ruined a lot. Due to uni work and work I would wake up at like 10AM and then depending on the day I would reach home from work at like 1:30AM the next day. If the day consists of studying then I would try to study the entire night, usually I fail and end up sleeping at 2-3AM. Maybe I should contact mt gp for sleep help.

Yeah, study is one aspect of my life, but its just the parental pressure as I've had stressfull experiences with it in the pass between my dad and I.

In terms of quitting, that one is a hard one, but alright yeah, I'll take breaks 🙂

Ty ❤️