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Re: Let's Discuss: Coping with End Of Year Challenges

Thank you @Shaz51 and @tyme .

 

Here for you too, if you’d like to talk. 

 

 

 

Re: Let's Discuss: Coping with End Of Year Challenges

I'd like to add a little note of a tactic that might help someone.

 

One of the tricky aspects of this time of year is losing track of the days. Our weirdo calendar system means annual events on a fixed date fall on different days of the week each year.

 

Tomorrow (dec 25) is a Wednesday.

 

Simple as that.

 

It's so easy to let others - be it society as a whole or the people closer to us - dominate our perceptions and coping mechanisms at this time of the year.

 

If it's easier for you to remember it's just another Wednesday, then do so!

 

I'm not going to watch a boxing match on Thursday, either 🙂

 

It's just another day.

 

Same applies to Dec 31st. People will blow up sparkly things, scaring the *&^% out of many animals like the typically selfish and inconsiderate species we are, but the next day is just another day.

Re: Let's Discuss: Coping with End Of Year Challenges

Thanks @Shaz51 🙂

Re: Let's Discuss: Coping with End Of Year Challenges

On behalf of the board and team at SANE I wanted to wish peace, silly Xmas jokes and a good cuppa to all of you in the forums family today. 

 

Re: Let's Discuss: Coping with End Of Year Challenges

Wishing you a great day @RachSANECEO 😊

Re: Let's Discuss: Coping with End Of Year Challenges

@RachSANECEO I hope you have a good Chrissy too.

 

@Shaz51 wishing you a Merry Christmas hon 💕💕

 

To all out there, however you spend the day. Whether you are alone, with friends and family, don't celebrate xmas or even working. I hope you have a good day today and can find some small moments of joy in it.

 

Re: Let's Discuss: Coping with End Of Year Challenges

Thinking of all today. I know some are happy celebrating, some are not feeling joyful at all with the celebration, some are alone, some feel alone with people around and some of you it’s just another day. 

I hope however you are dealing with today that you can all find some time for some self care and make yourself a priority. 

Merry Christmas to you too @RachSANECEO 

Re: Let's Discuss: Coping with End Of Year Challenges

Hi @tyme ,

sorry you have had tough Christmas times. I know what you mean, it is a struggle without support. It is so surreal these days without my mum and Nanna at Christmas, and they just keep moving on. I think it is actual a time to remember any happy memories and to try to enjoy the day. 

Re: Let's Discuss: Coping with End Of Year Challenges

Hi Everyone

 

Is anyone else struggling a bit more today than any day of this 'festive' season to date?

 

For me, I know it's my chronic pain that is the kicker, but I tried my usual day and it was just that much different enough to feel ... difficult.

 

Recognised the excess pain level, and all the other difficulties, early so aborted but still feeling it.

 

I wrote about a 'reckoning' being more than likely, but didn't expect some of it to start already. Every time I can't reach pain suppression, the difficult thoughts crank up to constantly nagging levels. Makes merely passing time bloody difficult. Especially when I need to blast out the noise to prevent my high-density scenario from suffocating me with it's noise.

 

An astounding ability I ***sometimes***, unreliably, have in these situations is to somehow fling an imaginative but random idea out there, as a means of coping, then potentially chase it up if I can. I don't consider this a particularly fabulous 'skill' or any such psychobabble label someone (who usually isn't suffering a mental health-impacted existence themselves, never has) might throw at it. Is just survival and I want more than that. But, given right now I want to just cry and scream at the fundamental lack of fairness in my health scenario, it's an alternative, at least.

 

At present, that imagination (or, probably, better known as ingenuity perhaps) is taking the form of what may be an 'off topic' query for this thread. But, as I'm new to these forums (and they're a bit weird relatively to other forums / forum software) and it's really very hard to think right now, I'll just pop it out there. Please be gentle, mods, if I'm transgressing as I have rejection sensitivities you wouldn't believe.

 

I just want to ask ... does anyone, if you have some sort of NDIS scenario (utterly bloody well useless though it ***may be***), have a 'support worker' who is available today? Is that something I am potentially missing out on? If so, and there's really very good reasons why such as meeting new people - telling my story mostly - is so hard for me, maybe at least there's a possibility that what I'm experiencing now (outsie of the pain factor, if that's even possible to set aside and I'm not really sure it is) could possibly - or not - be eased by some sort of support worker person.

 

Boy it was hard to get through that sentence. Don't think I did very well.

 

That said, if you are one of those who seek NDIS support but have yet to gain approval, so reading my idea about a support worker to ease my situation may seem a touch bitter, please know that ... well, let's just say that in my case, all is not what it may seem.

Re: Let's Discuss: Coping with End Of Year Challenges

Yup Xmas - hard work. This year the first time Dorothy of on my own after a relationship break up of 25 years. Spent it with my mum which has its moments (‘I am gratefull for her ) ‘but that relationship isn’t the easiest either.

 

knowing my ex has her whole family staying in the house we bought together which is a mess cause I’m moving out, being scared they will throw out my stuff ( they did a little but not as bad as I was imagining ) ‘it was a weird space for my head to be in… I keep asking what questions her family will be asking her and how many lies will she tell them .. but none of that really matters does it ? 

what matters is how I navigate forward how I stay on track to removing myself from the toxic dumpster fire of our marriage and make a new life. 

I’m on the other side of Xmas now thankfully and heading into new years- in my house packing the last of my stuff into storage .I resent that I have to bad use the house is ours she has more acess to income than I do and well she always said she bought the house for me.. now it’s done she has made it in possible for me to live here and I can’t trust she won’t damage anthing I leave behind just out of spite.  

while I pack away the reminants what I want to carry forward and look after our animals (hopefully for the last time )  she’s off at a festival with a new person - celebrating and meeting there family I wonder what I would say if that person contacted me and asked about her behaviour. I wonder if that person will suffer like I did. (thats an intrusive thought I don’t need eh.. ) the funny side of that is she was actully trying to buy fire feul  of me so she could impress the new chick…

she hasn’t played with fire with me for three years but is suddenly very interested in it now we are separated … but only so she can impress new lovers, and I have a world of feelings about that.

 

I have big gigs over the new year so while others are partying and celebrating I’ll be preparing, and working that’s always the way for me it’s a busy time and I’m gratefull for the work and to have bookings and something to focus on that’s not my relationship woes.

 

packing up one’s life is hard, esp in this context I’m trying to eat well, sleep , exirsise and just do my best but it’s hard and being able to speak my truth helps me not keep it all inside like a poison.. 

 

tips for moving out  of long term relationships and going no contact with your ex ?